Friday, September 16, 2011

Now and then

I haven't found the time to write here in so long. We have been so busy. Planning the memory walk, getting Sadie off to school for the first time, and - of course - taking care of a new baby.

And along with all the craziness that each day brings, there is Sawyer.

Always there. Always in my heart. Always on my mind.

Landon looks so much like Sawyer that I often find myself trying not to look at his face while he's asleep. That is when the familiarity is all-too real. Erik shared with me the same fears - they look so much alike that a few times we've both thought Landon was dead in his sleep, with the same peaceful face his brother kept.

And yet, here we are.

Going through the motions of life. Somehow moving farther past the moment in our lives when he was here - time growing between now and then like a gaping wound that will never heal.